Appreciation Ltd

We will collect your things, with your prior consent of course, clothes, electronics, books, photos, furniture - as much as you want. Then it’s important that you know that these belongings are gone - permanently, so it might sound strange to tell you that they are not gone permanently, but despite telling you now, you will believe that they are, and that part isn’t hard don’t worry, it’s just about trust - or a lack of trust I should say. 

We will monitor how you are managing without your belongings, feel free to report anything to the police or insurance companies, we have their details too so can coordinate with them on our side - again, it will appear to you as a conspiracy against you, but you will have legally consented so you will find your interactions with these agencies and companies frustrating. 

Once we feel there will be maximum appreciation for the return of your belongings, we will begin the phased return of select or all of your belongings. It’s important that you understand, or believe,  that it might not be a full return to maximise the gratitude you have for your property. I promise that it will more than meet the need that you have to buy things. These are things that you know fit, that you know work, that look good on you, that make your house look good. You spent a long time planning to buy these things and you spent well earned money on these things. You will look at your spoons even in a whole new light I promise you. It’s a wonderful feeling to revalue what you already have. And I should add that 1% of our clients find they value a more Cynic lifestyle and learn that they don’t value belongings in general. In which case, we can find good homes for your belongings too. 

How does this sound? 


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